My father has been neglected to care since childhood, and Jerry Yan feels inferiority in his bones! A single child has a mood that doesn t want to lose

From the arrogant young master in "Meteor Garden" to the top Asian F4, Jerry Yan looks so arrogant and confident, but in fact, he is inferior to most people!

After never seeing such a sincere visit, Jerry Yan accepted the magazine "People" in the mainland, and plainly described his state of mind from time to time gaining fame, losing in the sound of fairy praise, and then silently silence and reappearing again. All of these are derived from his own "inferiority".

{9 During the visit, the magazine editor asked Jerry Yan how popular he was back then?

Jerry Yan said: "The first time I realized that I was red, probably because the four of us started to go to different countries to meet the president. Once, I forgot which country they went to. They said that it was Xiao Bush who came to see the president at the ceremony. It was the first time I thought, hey, it was really red."

But before the performance of Daomingsi, he was just an ordinary model, and even at the beginning, he was going to play Ximen, but the actors who were originally going to play Daomingsi and were more red did not want to play with them, so I had this opportunity. "From ordinary people to F4 and "Meteor Garden", we really got a lot of experience, and most people don't have the ability to imagine it. In that environment, I was afraid of forgetting who I was, because from the beginning to the end, I was not Daoming Temple, I was just a sacred child!" said Jerry Yan.

"Liking to be sick" has won the father's affectionate eyes

As for why is he so inferior? Jerry Yan mentioned that this has a lot to do with his childhood: "Before he was born, my father didn't like me. My sister was angry, and my father would never touch her. I put the bowl and forcefully, and I would die in the next second. My father punched and kicked her."

He really doubted whether he was coming? Such experience made him feel very inferior and kept thinking about what he had done wrong... Therefore, when he was a child, he liked getting sick: "Because my father would look at me with a warm look only when he was sick. Once, I ran to the tree to get a bee, and I was so tired that I was in a coma, and I also went to the local newspaper news."

"I was confused, I remember that my father's kind "

Cherish the toys bought by my father very much

"I used to have a super cute cartoon, so I told my dad that I wanted that toy. My dad hit me and said, "Why would you buy toys for you if you don't have much money at home?" Yan Jerry Yan thought to himself, he was doing odd jobs outside, can you not have such a thing?

"I cried and begged my dad, but in the end he still bought it. But when I grew up, my mother dropped the toy. After becoming Daoming Temple, I started to make some money, found a medieval shop, bought it back, and I thought it was so precious."

A single child had a feeling of not wanting to lose

Over time, Jerry Yan felt that no one wanted it and was not worthy of being loved, and this voice kept amplifying. "When I was 12 years old, my dad left. My family was not well off and my family was a family. I became even more inferior. I kept wondering why I would let others scold me? Why don't everyone like me?"

Maybe because of this, he was not convinced in many things. Once, he went to the park to play basketball. When he played, he wanted to marry his daughter to him. He said that he was playing basketball so hard that he was really hard.

Jerry Yan said, "It's strange that many of the artists who have developed quite well during the period are single families. In our F4, there are three people who are single. Usually, single children have a feeling of not wanting to lose, and they always want to prove it for them."

No chance to reconcile with his father

"Later, I became Daoming Temple, performed in "Meteor Garden", and went to concerts around the world, but my father didn't see it. I didn't have the chance to reconcile with him at all. It was like a deep end. I was not sure, maybe I haven't come out now."

After growing up, he went to see it one time The teacher in psychology said to him, "You want to reconcile with your father. Although his father is in the sky, I still hope you will be well." After hearing these, Jerry Yan said that he had no expression on his face and had no emotion at all, but his eyes were flowing...

Therefore, he realized that his father and childhood had such a deep impact on him. "I played a role before, and my father was very bad to my children. There was a scene where he was reconciling with his father. When I was acting, I kept crying. It seemed that some things in my heart that had been released for many years."

It was difficult to express love and accept other people's love

Jerry Yan admitted that he was difficult to exorcise his father's shadow. Especially in the past two years, he found that he and his mother were so similar. "We are all people who are hard to express our love. My mother obviously is for my good intentions and wants to care about me, but she always takes care of me. She must first recite when she says it."

"I found that this thing has been circulating on me. I treat the staff around me in the same way. I obviously want to care about her, but I will keep reciting. You Why don’t you eat early? Why don’t you go to rest? ”

"I also find it difficult to accept other people’s love. Some people praise me and express me. I think he is polite and subconsciously think, "Don’t you say I’m so sad?"

Inferiority seems to be always on myself...

Jerry Yan feels that his childhood and original family have made his personality less complete in some aspects. "After "Meteor Garden, I seem to have superficial confidence, but I really don't have the confidence in my bones.. ”

Now, he met many people who would say, "Please, brother, you are still inferior in your old age. What do you want to inferior in yourself? In fact, I can't answer it. It seems that inferiority is always on me."

Inferiority also makes him not so sensible

"Success is inferior, and failure is inferior." This sentence is too stressful to Jerry Yan. "I'm still talking to myself now and keeping myself insulting myself. Jerry Yan, you're not so good now."

"Emergency sometimes hurts me and also helps me." He said that the director often said to him: "Jerry, I think you are right. You don't pay so much attention to yourself, so you won't be so upset." He suddenly felt that his inferiority complex was on the stage.

"If I were young and grown up in a wealthy environment, or were very accustomed to being loved and praised, I would be very confident, and I really know how to go, and I might run to the oily area. Maybe you may not necessarily want to visit me when you see me now."

Psychologist: The role of parents is very important

Lang Zhongyi, a consultant psychologist, explains that self-confidence comes from "self-affirmation". The sense of value of self-existence is self-affirmation, and this sense of recognition is not something that can be cultivated overnight. We must rely on parents to help children establish a sense of value of self-affirmation from a young age.

However, before establishing a sense of self-affirmation, one must first establish a "sense of security"; parents' safe dependence relationships with their children will naturally make him feel safe. Only when he feels that he is a child worthy of love can he gradually build a value of self-affirmation.

Liang Zhongyi also pointed out that confident parents teach confident children, so the role of parents is very important: "When children look at their parents' growth, the life wisdom that parents show on weekdays is the best example of example!"